Restaurant Made for Two Is Probably Where Long-Term Relationships Go to Die

I’m bitter, guys. I see a headline for a romantic, “two-person” restaurant and immediately imagine an hour of awkward silences, followed by an hour of failed footsie attempts, rounded-out with 20 minutes spent driving home and hoping the kids are already asleep so you won’t have to feed them cough syrup (the bottle’s almost empty).

Intimacy is fine. Forced intimacy is slightly stressful. Without distractions, how is someone supposed to stay interesting for an entire night? I’m guessing that’s just one of the dilemmas faced by couples who visit Italy’s Solo Per Due (“Just for Two”) restaurant, the “world’s smallest” two-person restaurant designed to give fancypants middle-aged couples an uber-exclusive, uber-romantic dining experience, all for only $335 a person.

The location and decorations look a little like a dustier Macaroni Grill and the menu consists of homemade pasta and bread, wild fruits, mushrooms and “local confections,” according to Design Taxi.

After being walking down the candle-lit driveway and being greeted by the owner himself, couples proceed to spend their intimate evening staring at their menus, staring at the décor, staring at their food, completely avoiding eye contact with one another, and then leaving a glowing review in the restaurant’s “Memory Book,” – followed, of course, by a Polaroid of themselves from the 1950s and their phone numbers, just in case.

H/T + PicThx Design Taxi