Tony Stark-Level Lifehack: Now You Can Have Your Own Personal Brand of Whiskey

If you’re one of the 5% of people living in the developed world who hasn’t seen any of the Iron Man movies, just know that Tony Stark is the king of personal branding (second only, perhaps, to Joel Schumacher’s Batman, for who could forget those lovely Bat-Nipples?). And if Tony knew he could create, brand and sell his own personal “Iron Man” whiskey, you know he’d be all over that. Heck, he’d probably say it was his idea.

Unfortunately, most of us don’t have mountains of disposable income and personal hi-tech “bodyguards” to play with, so we just have to settle for that personal whiskey thing to make our billionaire playboy dreams come true. Luckily, we do have the Mississippi River Distilling Company to make things a little easier.

They call it their “My Whiskey” Custom Whiskey Program. For just $6,000, the distillery will partner with a licensed retailer to bring you your own 30 gallon barrel. Just pick the grain bill, the yeast, the barrel, the age, the proof and the name and wait for delivery in the mail. Once completed, your 80 proof stock will be able to produce about 160 bottles of finished whiskey, which, if you decide to sell them, will end up working out to about $38 per bottle.

But that’s not including all the celebrity sponsorship you’re gonna get. Ooh, and the advertising money from Facebook. Or the movie product placement! Honey, by the time you’re done, these bad boys will be going for $1000, easy.

Malibu beach house, here I come.

H/T + PicThx Cool Material