This Bizarrely Hilarious Twitter Account Is About Carrots, Possibly Run By A Carrot
This one’s a serious case of In-Case-You-Missed-It, in which case we did, and we’re bad, and we feel bad.
Since January 2013, a Twitter user by the name @RealCarrotFacts has been posting just that — carrot “facts.” You know, if veracity were determined by some sad, high, self-aware root vegetable with grammar issues, who was also recently dumped by a girl named “Megan.” Between tweets about how hard it is to find love, Carrot Facts muses about how carrots help cure headaches (if you take Advil afterwards), and how sometime the moon looks like a carrot (if you hold a carrot in front and pretty much just look at the carrot).
There’s even the occasional pop-culture reference, like this weekend’s leaked NSFW “celebrity” carrot nude. Basically if you haven’t seen it already yet, it’s an inexplicably amusing way to count down to the weekend. Huzzah!
Have a headache? Eating a carrot can help if you take a Advil after it
— Carrot Facts (@RealCarrotFacts) August 30, 2013
if you lost the cork to your 7.99$ little pengin wine, just put a carrot in it. No one will notice because I am alone
— Carrot Facts (@RealCarrotFacts) August 30, 2014
Carrots have it all: health, taste , even an okay flavor
— Carrot Facts (@RealCarrotFacts) August 1, 2014
you Can try to comb your hair with a carot but it doesnt work good so just buy a comb , they not that expensive at CVS
— Carrot Facts (@RealCarrotFacts) January 19, 2014
turn down for carrot
— Carrot Facts (@RealCarrotFacts) July 26, 2014
always kep a carrot under your doormat , then if you lock out you can nibble a dirty carrot while waiting for the lodsmith
— Carrot Facts (@RealCarrotFacts) July 19, 2014
” i think, therefore I crunch” – rene desCarrot
— Carrot Facts (@RealCarrotFacts) July 12, 2014
“just chew it ” – Nike carrot
— Carrot Facts (@RealCarrotFacts) February 1, 2014
bring a carrot to a funeral as a way of saying “im sorry your dead here is a crispy vegtable”
— Carrot Facts (@RealCarrotFacts) December 17, 2013
if you Throw a carrot at it hits a small asian man in the head, it might be good luck but i am not sure yet
— Carrot Facts (@RealCarrotFacts) December 2, 2013
Breakig: nud photo of carrot leak online NFSW pic.twitter.com/rCnNwNny88
— Carrot Facts (@RealCarrotFacts) September 1, 2014
