Sperm, those tiny elusive fellows, have been the subject of humor and wonder throughout history — boasting an impressive repertoire rivaled only by the egg. That being said, since we’re all adults here, ahem, let’s fess up: You’ve thought about it. Is this stuff healthy or what? Is a tablespoon of semen enough to replace our daily protein shake? Is it the new new superfood that we should be popping like daily vitamins? Or, is it secretly just a dollop of mayo in disguise?

Well, here’s the breakdown: According to the Greatist, the average male ejaculation is the size of about one teaspoon and contains somewhere between 5 – 25 calories with a “minimal amount of protein.” Surprisingly, semen is composed of only 1 percent actual sperm — the rest of the goods consist of over 200 different proteins, vitamin C, calcium, fructose, lactic acid, zinc, sodium and other vitamins and minerals.

Of course, depending on your age and dietary habits, the level of these compounds will vary. Although, we don’t recommend trying to substitute wheatgrass shots with the sticky liquid, a teaspoon probably isn’t going to do much for your post-workout meal.

Well, now you know. Also, calm down, that’s mayonnaise in the picture.

H/T Greatist + PicThx SeriousEats

Charisma MadarangTwitterFacebook

Charisma has an undying love for gritty literature and drinks coffee like water. She also hails from Toronto, Canada and is a die-hard Maple Leafs fan, sigh.