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This Anti-New Year's Resolution Burger Features a 100% Bacon Patty, Fried Egg, Whiskey-Soaked Onions and an Entire Grilled Cheese Sandwich

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Every month, SoCal-based burger chain Slater's 50/50 unveils a new, completely over-the-top, featured hamburger for the month. In the past we've seen donut burgers, chorizo burgers, even orange chicken and kangaroo burgers.

Now, Slater's wants to remind us that New Year's Resolutions are hard, and skinny will never quite feel as good as bacon tastes, with its latest Excesstasy Burger and Ice Cream Sandwich, available through January.

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The burger (and bear with me, because it's a doozy): two brioche buns tenuously nestled around an all-natural beef patty, a bed of arugula and garlic tomato confit, another 100% ground bacon patty soaked in bone marrow butter, white cheddar, a WHOLE bacon grilled cheese sandwich, Southern Comfort whiskey drunken onions, and a sunny-side up egg, topped off with Slater's house made thousand island aioli.

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And the dessert sandwich: a fresh-basked peanut butter sugar cookie atop two scoops of chocolate chip cookie dough ice cream atop a giant homemade peanut butter cup atop two schools of vanilla ice cream, all atop a fresh-baked chocolate chip cookie.

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Wash both down with a hoppy pale ale and a porter for a proper start to 2014. Who needs juice cleanses, anyhow?