Cooking With the Salty Tears of the Innocent
If you’re tired of cooking with the same old salts and seasonings, that very feeling of tiredness might be turned into a salt one day.
These strange signature salts are Tears of Sorrow, Tears of Anger, Tears of Laughter, Tears Shed While Chopping Onions and Tears Shed While Sneezing, and are being sold at London’s Hoxton Street Monster Supplies.
These products have to leave one to question who the heck did they sadden, anger, amuse, force to chop onions and make sneeze enough to produce a bottle full of tears?
Usually, tasting the sweet tears of human emotion can be left to psychopaths like South Park’s Eric Cartman, but with that said, the average cook might not be Hoxton’s key demographic. Upon clicking on Hoxton Street Monster Supplies’ page, you can quickly tell that it is not your average online shop. Its header even reads, “Purveyor of quality goods for monsters of every kind.”
These salty tears must be in high demand as the supply seems to already be sold out and the site reads that they will, “Replenish supplies shortly.”
Hoxton Street Monster Supplies is an operating name for a charity Called the Ministry of Stories, an organization dedicated to creative storytelling. My best guess would be that this product is merely a concept brought to light by one of their creative writers, or they’re abusing these young writers and sucking the tears out of their creative little eyes.
Whatever the case, it’s kind of creepy, but intriguing nonetheless.
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